Rada Dorman attended the Orthodox-aligned Hillel Academy as a child. As an adult, she married a man who is Lutheran.
“I don’t feel that I fit in the standard synagogue buckets,” said the Glendale resident. “When we were looking at synagogues to join, he didn’t feel as comfortable. He didn’t feel as welcome in certain synagogues.”
It’s a reality that more observant Jewish spaces can feel less welcoming for mixed faith families. It’s also true that people who grow up in Orthodox spaces don’t always feel fully comfortable in less observant spaces.
Dorman has found her place with Own Your Judaism, a Milwaukee based nonprofit that aims to “meet you where you are.” Own Your Judaism does not seek to compete with local synagogues; rather, it supplements them or fills in the spaces not targeted.
Many who attend Own Your Judaism events belong to a synagogue and are just looking for a supplement. Dorman turned to Rabbi Moishe Steigmann, who leads Own Your Judaism, for her sons’ bar mitzvahs and for prayers at an unveiling. “It was one of those things – where do we go? Moishe kind of filled that void for us.”
Debbie Callif, a board member, said she prefers to connect with Judaism though activities that are more tactile, like an Own Your Judaism nature walk or putting together “little love packages” for soldiers in Israel. Though synagogues, of course, also offer an array of tactile opportunities, something about a roving space for it without weekly services clicked for her.
“There is a good bit of typecasting that happens in the more established Jewish community, particularly within the synagogue world,” said Own Your Judaism board chair Brian King. “You are Reconstructionist or you’re Reform, or you’re Conservative, or you’re one of any number of different strands of Orthodoxy, and that type casting can feel artificial or constricting for a lot of Jews.”
But King, the former head of school for Milwaukee Jewish Day School, quickly added: “I want to be really clear that Own Your Judaism is not an answer to synagogues. Own Your Judaism is a partner with synagogues. We have a mentality of abundance. Not one of, ‘Oh, not them. It’s us.’ Not at all. This is about recognizing that there are people for whom traditional synagogue life might not feel 100% comfortable.”
“In many ways, I’m original to the organization. I go back to even before it existed, in 2017,” King added. He’s been on the board for years, through learning cohorts, adding board members, and changing the name from “The Spark Wisconsin” to a more focused “Own Your Judaism.”
Dorman – the mom who attended Hillel Academy and in adulthood married a man who is Lutheran – is now on the Own Your Judaism board, too. She wants to give back, because she sees Steigmann as supporting people “who don’t fit in a box.”
Regarding Judaism and Lutheranism, she said: “We initially tried to raise our kids with both. And then at some point I said, ‘You know what? I think they’re leaning more towards Jewish – I’ll own that part of it.’”
“The great thing about Moishe is that he’s able to kind of go with the flow and meet people where they are and say … let’s figure that out together,” Dorman said.
“He took my son under his wing. He taught him. He did the services for his bar mitzvah in our backyard.”
* * *
* * *
* * *
Read more
Loading ...