It’s back-to-school time. And time for the Jewish High Holy Days.
It is time for parents around the country to breathe a collective sigh of relief. We’ve made it through another summer.
We’ve sent our children to camp; we’ve taken them to parks and day trips and long walks around the neighborhood. We’ve ridden bikes, eaten ice cream, applied sunscreen and washed bathing suits and towels until we can wash no more.
Now we look ahead with hope and expectation to both a new school year and a new Jewish year (5772).
What will we make of this New Year? How will this year be different than those of the past? What do we hope to teach our children so that we can sleep at night confident in our efforts to help our children be the best they can be?
One of my favorite teachings that remind us of our obligation to ponder these lofty questions comes from the Hebrew Bible, from the Book of Proverbs (22:6): “Train up a child in the way he should go; and when he is old he will not depart from it.”
The foundations we lay today affect the kind of adults our children will become. Activities and rituals we create with our children could be the very same ones that they rely upon when they are adults and parents.
So what are these “magic” rituals? Where do we find them? How do we make them special? What do we have to resolve to teach?
Don’t worry, and don’t look far. As with most things in life, the ones that come from your heart are the most valuable.
Take for example giving tzedakah, or charity. Do you find that you have extra coins around your house? Feel like buying an extra can of vegetables or two when you leave the grocery store? Take these and make them a ritual; share the value of giving with your child from the time they are little.
It’s a custom to give tzedakah on Shabbat. Something as small as 18 cents. Why not make your own tzedakah box with your children and then allow them to put a few of your spare coins in each Friday?
Intimidated by the idea of making a tzedakah box? Don’t be. It can be as simple as decorating a shoe box with a hole cut out on top to deposit coins, or even a ceramic bank that you find at local craft store that you and your child paint.
When the container is full, have a discussion about where you would like the money to go.
Wondering what to do with the extra cans from the grocery store? Oftentimes, there are bins for the Hunger Task Force at the store exits. If there isn’t a bin, take a trip to the Harry & Rose Samson Family Jewish Community Center and we’ll make sure your cans make it to the Jewish Community Pantry that will re-open this fall. (See story Section One, page one.)
Make giving tzedakah a habit and your children will not only look forward to it, but it is something they will keep with them for life.
Another great way to create and find rituals is by reading Jewish books with your child and then discussing them when you are done.
The PJ Library is a great program that can help you build your child’s Jewish library. Founder Harold Grinspoon has taken it upon himself to make sure that parents and grandparents have Jewish bedtime stories to read to their children.
His library idea started off in just a few communities but has now reached across North America and even into Israel — the two millionth book was just sent in the mail.
These free books for children six months to six years old that arrive in our homes each month are great sources of conversation and learning.
One parent proudly told me that her son received “Engineer Ari and the Rosh Hashanah Ride” from PJ Library. He loves it so much that they read it every night and now he wants to have apples and honey just like in the book.
Come this Rosh HaShanah, he’ll be so excited when he sits down to experience their holiday meal. Such enthusiasm from a children’s paperback book.
Whatever the motivation, this New Year is a perfect time to start the year off right with our children. May it be a year of sweetness, health and happiness for all of our families.
Rabbi Shari Shamah is the Jewish Family Specialist at the Harry and Rose Samson Family JCC. As part of her work at the JCC she coordinates the PJ Library Program. She is also current president of the Wisconsin Council of Rabbis. For more information, contact Shamah at sshamah@jccmilwaukee.org or 414-967-8229.
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